Brush With Greatness

I just got out of the shower (fear not, I’m clothed), and I wanted to discuss a couple of things. Namely, two products I got at Target recently. These items can only be described as fantastically wonderful. Or I guess wonderfully fantastic would work, too. Up to you.

The shower-related products in question are a no-fog mirror and a brush on a stick. In the interest of saving the best for last, let’s start with the mirror.

A couple of months ago, on a trip to Utah, I found myself sans shaving cream, and in need of a shave. So, being already in the shower, I opted for the shaving-with-soap route, and miraculously it worked. My skin can be a bit sensitive, so I’m a little particular about how I shave (making the electric razor my sworn nemesis). But once this worked, I decided I was going to shave in the shower all the time (albeit with shaving cream). Hence, the mirror. So far, so great.

But the real winner is the brush. I mean, the mirror is good, but the brush…Whoa (if I might quote Joey Lawrence). It was an impulse buy, and when I first saw it, I thought of the Simpsons episode where Homer gets intentionally fat to go on disability. In this episode, Bart fantasizes about being fat in the future and saying, in his best redneck voice, “I warsh myself with a rag on a stick.” That freaked me out a bit, but, hey, I’m not that fat, so whatever. Using something on a stick to reach my back was a choice, not a requirement.

Anyway, the brush is a godsend. So much so that it has inspired me to (literally) sing its praises. So that everyone can play, I have selected a tune that most of the people reading this (including our friend Glitzy) should know: a portion of the UNC alma mater.

*clearing throat*

Hail to the greatest brush of all,
It cost six ninety-nine!
Shower back brush, priceless gem,
Receive all praises thine!

I could go into it being a back-brush born and a back-brush bred, but that would be over the top. Plus, I never want to imagine my back brush dead. So, in closing, Go to Hell, State.