Pack It Up, Pack It In

What do random pipe cleaners, a super ball, a dry-erase marker and my old watch have in common? Well, they’re all resting comfortably together in a shoe box in my room. Why do I keep these things, instead of just throwing them out like a sane person? Well, science has vindicated me at last. Turns out, being a pack rat is totally normal human behavior. Who knew?

Apparently, hamsters, given the chance, will obsessively collect glass beads. By comparison, it feels relatively normal knowing the aforementioned shoe box also contains matches from the Imperial Palace in Vegas; or a conversation tape I recorded for my first college Spanish class; or the Arabian Sandalwood incense that was part of a gag secret Santa gift from a buddy of mine years ago.

Or how about the receipt from when I got my ear pierced in 1997. Hell, I don’t even have the earring anymore. But the receipt for the piercing? You betcha.

The wallet that the Atlantic Ocean mercilessly destroyed some years back? Oh, I’ve still got it. In the box. Mind you, I have a perfectly good wallet in my back pocket right now. Yet I still have the old one.

And this is just one box. When my parents moved last year, I had to go into my childhood room and make some real hard decisions. (Note: for any normal person, these would be easy decisions.) It was traumatic throwing things away. I don’t like it. This is my biggest fear should I ever have to move: That I would have to throw out these random things in lieu of packing them to bring them somewhere else.

What’s a poor pack rat to do? Well, play with this super ball for starters. Maybe burn some incense lit with a Vegas match, lean back and listen to an old tape. Que divertido!