Lisa Leads Me to Link reLentlessly

I’m all about links today. Let that be known. So if you’re looking for endless streams of witty remarks … oh, well, I guess there’ll be a few. But mostly links.

First, we must thank Lisa for sending this one, Tar Heel Hip-Hop. Go play Track 12, seriously. Where else will you find lyrics like:

Jackie Man-u-el / you be doin’ it well

or

Let’s hook up at Players / Drink some Holy Grails
A couple pale ales / she’ll be shakin’ her tail

It’s way off the charts as far as unintentional comedy. Now to intentional comedy. Or at least intentional cleverness. This is clearly the most sexually clever ad of all time. In fact, it’s making me a little sad I have a laptop, with one of these stupid touchpads. Let’s move on.

I know I’ve talked about this before, and I promise, I really have nothing against the place, but the Ikea nuts are at it again.

Things get even less normal in outer space, where Saturn has its own Death Star. That’s pretty sweet.

And finally, everybody’s favorite little newsmaker/video slut, Paris Hilton, let her PDA get hacked and now her entire phone book is online! There are some questionable entries in there, like “Fux, Connor.” So is that the dude’s name, or, um, oh nevermind. And who is “Egplant dike ass”? And, more importantly, does she know that’s her name in Paris’ phone book?

Well, I’m done here, so the only real question left is who do I call first, Anna Kournikova or former Guns n’ Roses drummer Matt Sorum? (Are you kidding me – Matt f@%$* Sorum???).